“…say goodnight…”

Crime is out of control, my brother, and for sure, you are in over your head – and distress reigns.

As you know, my brother, some of our people [call them the criminal element] are obviously Hell-bent on destroying themselves and others – as they rush pell-mell towards the grave.

And, Tommy, as my people either wallow or soar, those who run things have cranked up the volume about who they are and as to how – if given one more chance – they will deliver the goods.

We have all heard those songs before; the ones about the man with the plan, another about the man with the deal and – yet again – the one about the man who was happy, happy, happy when someone dubbed him, a delivery boy.

Well, by damn, delivery boy is now an old man: Watch him strut!!!

And so, as the great and truly trusted and totally tested and also mightily victorious Free National Movement meets in Convention, I am waiting to hear what each great and truly tested and totally trusted Cabinet Minister and others have to say about their stewardship in these troubled times.

I am especially waiting to see and hear how the Minister of National Security, the Hon. Orville Alton "Tommy" Turnquest will prove that while things are going from bad to worse on his watch, that they are [paradoxically] also going from worse to better.

And for sure, I am especially waiting to see and hear from my pale-shadow brother of the darling dimple – none other than Bran the Man, McCartney – how he and my buddy Jack are getting on with the business of ridding the Bahamas of their so-called ‘illegals’.

And then, Lord knows, I want to hear from Mr. Basso Profundo, the Hon. Phenton Neymour as he tells me and the nation how it just happens to be our fault that light bills are going higher and higher – even as some of the nation’s most gifted engineers who work at the Bahamas Electricity Corporation explain how and why load-shedding seems to be a daily occurrence.

What I am trying to say is that – as distress and disaster reign in this land that is mine – I am looking forward to seeing and hearing from the trusted leadership that is ours in the guise of the Rt. Hon. Hubert Alexander Ingraham and his band of bright boys and girls.

Now brothers and sisters, please do not get me wrong when I use words like – tested – trusted – and – mightily – victorious to describe the brothers and sisters of mine who run things in the nation and in the ranks of the Free National Movement.

When I use these powerful words that seem so much like words of endearment, I use them precisely because I can use them and precisely because they prove that I can still hope and that I can still dream about a time and a place where leadership is trusted; where leadership has been tested and where leadership has [in truth and in fact] been effective in its stewardship.

Evidently, leadership in times past has been simply rotten; thus some of the bitter harvest being reaped today – and thus my jaundiced perspective on some like Christie and Ingraham who have been around for as long as I can remember.

And since I am now an old man, take my word that these two clever brothers have been around for a very, very long time.

And since I am now an old man, take my word that these two clever brothers owe their political provenance to their myriad of connections with the Rt. Hon. Sir Lynden O. Pindling, one of the authors of the modern Bahamas.

And so, brethren and sistren, as your Free National Movement meets in Convention, its members – like the twin they are to their counterparts in the Progressive Liberal Party – will do their stuff; they will jump up and down and they will call on Jesus and they will thank God for their good fortune and they will do their best to out-talk Bradley Roberts and then he will fire back and his leader will try to keep a low profile and Fred Mitchell will say that he just might vie for the post of leader and Bernard Nottage will be defeated and some one or the other will fire a ‘wutless’ barb at Christie and then Brave himself will bravely step forward to have everyone know that they should do the brave thing.

What I’m really trying to say is that the bloody beat will go on, regardless of this or that party’s national convention.

And so, I wait to hear from my nation’s leaders – especially those who are trying to keep the light on; the one with the dimple who is set on ridding the nation of any number of hard-working, honest, decent men and women who should be Bahamians – men and women prepared to give an honest day’s work for an honest day’s pay – men and women who actually believe that you eat bread by the sweat of your brow.

But brow, wow or not, I am reliably [please do not believe this lie] informed by an informant who reports to me directly from the innermost sanctuary of the Ministry of National Security that the FNM’s convention is going to be shocked awake when the Minister shares some earth-shattering intelligence concerning crime run amok on his watch.

The Minister will tell his audience that, "Violent activity as a result of the triple threat of the illicit drug trade, retaliation and conflict, account for 56 per cent of all the murders committed in The Bahamas so far this year.

He will tell the Prime Minister and the nation [live on National Radio and Television] that most of the murders in the Bahamas are a result of the aforementioned triple threat as some of them were drug related; some were the result of retaliation and some others came about as a result of conflict.

At this point, there will be a mighty round of applause for the Minister.

Once he has acknowledged the plaudits of the crowd, The National Security Minister will report that domestic violence accounted for some of the murders.

And then, wonder of wonders, Minister Turnquest will tell the FNM’s and the nation:

"…We recognize that most of these murders were as a result of circumstances that the Police could not have prevented…"

Turnquest will also say that the timing of the murders was also important to note as, scores of those murders took place between the hours of 4pm-8am; some between the hours of 4pm-12midnight; and some others of them between the hours of 12midnight and 8:00 a.m.

By this point, you must have gotten my drift – a brilliantly incisive Minister of National Security will expatiate on the obvious, illuminate things we all know and otherwise prove that he does have what it takes to lead this troubled nation nowhere fast.

And so, by the time the reaches the point where he says that the Strategy is designed to target serious crime, including murder, armed robbery, robbery, auto theft and house-break-ins, the Convention delegates would be focused on trying to figure out how they are going to get from there to where they live in one piece.

I am also fairly certain that by the time he reaches his peroration and when he is cued up to say,

"In addition to the work of the law enforcement agencies, effective crime-fighting strategies require a country-wide response, from individuals, civic organizations, the Church and the community, including the business community. We must not turn a blind eye to crime, whether it is drug trafficking, illegal gun possession, murder, robbery, the encouragement of illegal immigration, or general lawlessness," all and sundry would wish him a fond farewell from the front-line.